How billionaires would design a college campus

Charlie Munger, the 97-year-old billionaire and vice president of Berkshire Hathaway, has donated $ 200 million to the University of California, Santa Barbara, for a new dormitory. But just like that $ 300 surprise from Venmo with “foot photos” in the commentary, it has plenty of captures.

Munger, who has no architectural background, said his dormitory, Munger Hall, must follow his plan which includes housing 4,500 students – 94% of whom are said to have no windows – and providing only two exits for the whole building. Prove that if you are a billionaire, anything can be your hobby.

Here’s how we think some of your favorite billionaires would design the rest of the campus to match Munger’s dormitory.

Warren Buffett Dining Room

Yes, the architects begged him to call it the “Buffett Buffet,” but like his friend Munger, he didn’t listen. This dining room will only serve the McDonald’s Buffett meal and frozen Omaha steaks.

  • You’ll have to read the entire collection of his annual letters to shareholders while the steaks thaw with your bare hands.

Elon Musk Research Lab

Lots of state-of-the-art equipment that no one asked for. This laboratory has one objective: to solve a global problem in a really sexy and devious way.

Zuckerberg Greek Line

Commemorating some of his fondest college memories, Mark Zuckerberg’s honorary rank will be a testament to the kindness, generosity, and grace remembered during his college years at Harvard. But at the first sign of trouble, the buildings will be bulldozed and turned into a Beat Saber lounge.

Rihanna Performing Arts Center

No one has been there since 2017, so you’ll have all the space to yourself.

Shiba Inu Investor Pourhouse

This place opens and closes without notice and is pretty hit or miss if you want to have a good time there. No one is checking ID, the floor is covered in beer and on Wednesdays there is a super special Red Bull-Long Island / stale churro for $ 4. If you own dogecoin, expect to spit into your drink.

Bloomberg School of Journalism

Michael Bloomberg managed to find a way to add paywalls to physical buildings. Vending machines only contain 3 ounce sodas. The school has a fun tradition of holding elections every year where the person with the less votes becomes the Mr. News of the following year.

Whitney Wolf Herd Agricultural Center

Only place where women have the first places on the seats, but it is also full of drones.

Kim Kardashian Student Union

There is a lot going on there, but most of the union events are organized for publicity purposes only. The decor is expensive and cold, but everyone is a little jealous. Pete Davidson started to dwell on it a lot.

Jack Dorsey Lawn

The most relaxing area on campus. But you have to get there at 5am to snag a spot and they haven’t mowed the grass in years.

Oprah Winfrey Library

No key card needed to enter the building, just whisper your daily “I Am Loving” affirmations at the doors and they will open. An impressive number of copies of American dirt still in there, however.

Bezos Residence

The former Amazon CEO will offer high ceilings, minimal privacy and homework quotas to everyone who lives in the most efficient dormitory on campus. The goal of this design will be to provide shelter for as many students as possible, whether they feel comfortable there or not. The equipments include:

  • Your very own cowboy space suit
  • A research lab that’s not as good as the Musk Research Lab
  • A total ban on Bo Burnham
  • Education credit
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